A friend once asked me how I get the inspiration to write. I told him I get inspired the most when I am sad but he didn’t believe me. It sounds weird and could pass for a bad joke but it wasn’t a joke. I meant every word.
It was a defining moment for me when I took up the gauntlet to be an inspirational writer some years back. I took that decision during one of my saddest moments at the time but it happens to be one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my life.
Very few of us are able to have a deep reflection about the vicissitudes of life when we are happy. You may be one of the few but I know I’m not. We all wish our happy moments last longer. Rightly so, but life stands on two legs to balance, the good times and the bad times.
You can call family and friends to celebrate your joyous moment with you. If you have other important goals to smash, you can even defer the celebration of an accomplishment till a future date. Not so for grief. Grief is personal and it takes its natural course. Grief has no short cut.
As my brother stares at me like a traveller on a voyage who is expected back in few days, I asked myself, what if he had deferred the impact he could make on humanity till a better time that never came? To him, time is gone and gone forever.
As I stared at my brother’s lifeless body during that dark hour when day turned to night, I asked myself, what if we had waited for a better time to show him love? To us, the time to show him love is gone and gone forever.
The torrents of messages that have been pouring in are comforting. The soothing words dull the scars inflicted by the sharp pains of a grieving heart but the scars never go away. They only get healed with the passage of time. Thank you all 🙏
I searched for what else any man could have done for our brother to stay alive but I found none. It then must have been by God’s design which no man could help. We mourn because we are pained but we should not grieve as though we don’t have Christ in us. Our comfort is in resurrection.
The freest human beings are those who do things their own way. Otunba Akin Oluwadare lived life on his own terms. He did things his own way. He was the freest human being.
What is more? For a man who dedicated his life to community service, for a servant who sold himself to developing human capital, for a brother who gave me an identity, what is left for me is to celebrate his life and times and that is what I choose to do.
…and to the rest of us who still have the chance, please give flowers to your loved ones when they can still smell it. A thousand bouquet at the gravesite are just a part of the funeral. Celebrate life for all that it is worth because grief has no short cut.
Travel safely, brother. I celebrate you, Sir.
©️Akin Oluwadare Jnr
10 June 2025
